What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

How can I help my cat adjust to sleeping in its own room after allowing it to sleep with us as a kitten?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Does Donald Trump have low self-esteem?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

What is one fantasy you have never told anyone about but really want to do?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

What was your most embarrassing wardrobe malfunction in public?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What is the most heartbreaking or sad love story that you ever had (experienced)?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

What's it like to have an IQ of 140 to 170? Do people notice you're different?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

TEXT:

Were any US Generals hurt or killed yesterday in Damascus, Syria, yesterday 5/9/24?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

When an Air India flight crashed into a medical campus, surviving doctors rushed to save lives - Politico

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why do many modern Hollywood films rely heavily on CGI and visual effects instead of actual sets? What is your opinion on this trend?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Make Nazis afraid again!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Is Pampano safe to eat?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Is it true that all men want a woman who looks like an Instagram “model”?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!